Who gave birth to her, Me or You?

Ok, I have no problem with parenting advice but when others say Do it this way" That is telling me and not advising me. I am always open to advice of any kind, including parenting advice. Being a new mom has it's challenges, and I am grateful for the advice but sometimes it gets overwhelming with advice. I recently read up in one of my many baby magazines that it is better to stir the bottle instead of shake it,causes less bubbles for gas. So I came up up something even more creative. Since I don't always want to stir I take the bottle inbetween my palms rub together. This creates a stirring type action. Well my mom's partner saw me doing this and asked what I was doing and then I explained. Well as the week goes by I am told "oh don't do that do this". I was told to loosen the nipple base and squeeze the bottle to reduce the air, this would have to be done about three times. I find this to be ineffective and time consuming. She likes things done there way anyway. Well this morning my child was brought to me and I was told to take her and change her or something. Well my brother was there and asked me if I wanted him to take her, I said ok just change her diaper and bring her back(so I could breastfeed). So then she asks me why didn't I take her, I said I had a headache(didn't want to sit up right away,sleep headache). So I am like, 1)Why are you asking me why I didn't do something,and 2)Who are you to be saying anything to me about it, you are not my mother. So I am sitting here wondering why in the hell does she feel the need to always have an input about how I handle my child. Like I said, advice is one thing but telling me it has to be done this way is another. I honestly don't know how to approach her on this because she is hotheaded and controlling. But I am not going to just sit there and take this from her forever.

My recent revelation

I was just sitting here thinking and realized I drive myself insane but, not as much as I used to,lol. I wonder to my self about men that father children and are half ass fathers. I was just discussing this last night. When a man lays down with a woman and decides to have "sex with consequences"(as I like to call it) what is really going through his head. When I lied down with my child's father I knew and accessed the consequences. Now I will admit my calculations were a bit off because I was dealing with having faith in him to do the right thing.Now with men it seems that they just do this ish cause it feels good "raw". Are they serious? So then when the woman gets pregnant it is like "I didn't know this would happen". Now with my child's father he "said" I want to have a baby with you. Well now that she is here its like he doesn't know what to do. Mind you this is not his only child. So you would think he would already know, or is it just that the responsibility is too overwhelming. In my opinion like him and many others like him see how independent a woman is or knows good and damn well she ain't gonna let nothing happen to her child. So if he don't provide she will have too. And once a man sees that a woman will do this I think that he feels he doesn't have to contribute a damn thing. Another thing that I find ridiculous is when some men don't want another man to step in and take care of his child but he does nothing for that child himself. My child's father wants all the rights in the world to his daughter but what is he really going to do when he gets them. I call this the "show" or "pretend" father. One who makes him self known only when he feels his "territory" is being threatened. I just find most of this ridiculously hilarious. I used to beg my child's father to contribute, now I don't even care to be honest. When his daughter gets old enough to realize and he still remains with this mindset she will see for herself as well as his feelings being hurt because he his daughter knows "Daddy" won't step up. I hope he changes not for me but for his own sake. Too many children have no father figures in their life. It's funny because his father was rarely there and then eventually just up and left. Now he is continuing the cycle,smh.